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Your romantic relationships go through cycles of apathy, pain and disconnection because there are conversations that were never brought to completion,

October 16, 2023


Disagreements that were never repaired fully.⁠

Emotions and arguments that never felt quite complete and therefore breaks of trust that never fully healed.⁠

⁠Resentment ensues…⁠

⁠And from there the unconscious desire to punish each other (through drama, distance, absent desire and constant bickering.)

Here’s where it gets challenging:

It need not have been a disagreement with that exact person.

For you carry in your heart the pain of all the past closures and emotions you avoided – and you’re bound to project it all over everyone you meet.⁠

⁠And no amount of “trying to connect”, be positive, work on polarity, or communicate well will solve anything until the core of the dysfunctions are dealt with.⁠

⁠Until you two come clean, every single attempt to connect will sink you lower and lower.⁠

⁠You will reach a point where you don’t know what else to do to feel heard, understood, seen and desired. ⁠

⁠Let me give you a quick example.⁠

⁠Imagine you and I met in person:⁠

⁠And right before our meeting a mutual friend you trust told you:⁠

“Nicolas shared with me that he thinks you’re annoying, weak and a pain in the ass to deal with..”⁠

⁠Yet I showed up to the meeting with a smile..⁠

⁠Being charismatic..⁠

Communicating Non-violently..⁠

Being respectful of your boundaries..⁠

Trying to be present and caring..⁠

Curious and compassionate..⁠

⁠All of that would smell funny to you.⁠

⁠My attempts to connect would feel like icing on a pile of 💩:⁠

Well intended but useless..⁠

⁠Because you would feel that underneath all my attempts, I judge you.⁠

⁠So in a way, the harder I try, the deeper the ship sinks.⁠

⁠Until I come clean.⁠

⁠(or you do, about what you know).⁠

⁠This is the core story behind most relational dysfunctions:⁠

There’s a core wound that remains unsolved.⁠

⁠And people try to go at it through couple’s therapy, polarity programs, spiritual practices and so on with zero results. ⁠

⁠Because as long as the roots of what separates you remain, the pain will grow back.⁠

⁠So.. if this feels familiar you should be on this weekends’ workshop. ⁠

⁠Don’t spend another year dreading your relationship or feeling like you need to coach your partner into communicating well, opening up, being vulnerable and proactive about relating consciously..⁠

⁠And deal with the root of things for once and for all.⁠

⁠⁠Comment “Interested” and I will forward you all the details.