As long as you keep playing pretend “spiritual” princess, you’ll remain powerless, aching to be rescued and will never -ever- become a queen.

You do NOT deserve anything you have not served for.

Let me make this clear:

‘To deserve’ (to be worthy of) comes from the latin word ‘deservire’ which meant to serve well, to serve zealously.

It has NEVER meant to sit down and expect for life and others to provide for you just because you exist.. although it alludes to the boundless wealth that flows in when you align yourself with your capacity to serve.

To serve is to be in harmony with the laws of life and nature: Giving and Receiving being two sides of the same coin.

You want to be a sacred, spiritual, feminine woman?

Start by reclaiming your connection to the Earth.

And last time I checked, Mother Earth gives/serves abundantly, without laziness and free of expectation or coercion.

Look at nature, she does not sit on her ass.

And it is in that unconditional, unattached service that the flower blooms with the most magnificent colours and fragrances – and life conspires for the bees to notice and drink from its nectar and for their legs and wings to spread life and pollen across the fields.

It receives abundantly because it has given abundantly.

That which is given comes back a hundred fold.

If it were entitled, expecting for the bees to come and pollinate without her doing her best to fulfill her part of the dance, it would die without offspring..

It would die without realizing the beauty it was capable of all along..

So do your work, it is sacred.

..And if the word “work” feels like a burden, I invite you to consider that your relationship with responsibility, playfulness and creativity need attention.

I’ll be blunt:

You deserve all the best – but for that you must serve with your best.

Your entitlement is the unconscious expression of your deep desire and craving for openness and receptivity.

It is blocking you from the abundant flow of life – for the world does not work in one’s favor through coercion or expectation.

No amount of sage, crystals, “goddess” clothing, tarot and human design readings will ever replace ACTUALLY doing the work.

The next are words from a Woman as a reply to my previous post “No More limp spiritual men.” (If you have not read it, please do so)

This is what she said:

“I think women can participate in excessive self-care (in a lazy disservice to their deeper potential) and use an endless loop of rituals and assume it’ll translate into spiritual “growth.”

The hyper-feminine, virtuous bypass often looks like this:

I idealize being in a constant state of bliss; friction is therefore to be resisted (and like muscles void of resistance grow soft, weak and powerless so does a life void of tension)

Weekly detoxing, feel-good card readings, and waving palo santo are the focus of my spiritual practice; my rituals validate my spiritual wisdom – or in other words: I tend merely to the content and context of my life so that I can ignore working on the intrinsic quality of it.

My free-spirited nature is a guise for indecision and personal stagnation. My feelings become the scapegoat of absent clarity, commitment and capacity to lead a fuller life.

My voice is reserved for positive vibes and to keep the peace (so that I may be perceived as ‘spiritually aligned’ therefore I freeze in challenges and often step over my own truth and boundaries in the name of people pleasing and avoiding conflict).

My attuned feminine energy will attract a partner to alleviate any friction involving masculine drive. I will therefore manipulate and seduce a man to provide, lead and care for me under the facade of divine polarity, so that I do not have to go deep within myself and heal the relationship with MY own masculine.

This is NOT grounded spirituality.

I truly believe the hyper-feminine is toxic to ourselves and disingenuous to realizing our greater potential as queens.

This feel-good, spiritual princess complex has its blind spots:

Living in a bubble and misconstruing the necessary effort to leave your comfort zone. Feeling entitled and deserving to a life you have put zero effort towards.

Physical rituals that serve as a distraction from informed shadow work, trauma healing and boundary setting. Thinking that sage, palo santo and a bath will cleanse and release decades of shitty thinking patterns, old resentments and poor lifestyle choices.

‘Free spirited’ aka flakey commitments towards yourself & others. Having your word be at the whim of your emotions, meaning you are not to be trusted for your agreements are constantly overridden by unstable moods, a hectic mind and turbulent feelings.

Compartmentalizing conversations as ‘good’ or ‘bad’, blocking the invitation towards authentic expression and self-reflection required for growth.”

Or in other words:

The volatility of your nervous system, paired with an unsettled mind create an emotional chaos that you often confuse or mislabel as intuition, therefore creating a space where being triggered is NEVER to be questioned, but that which triggers you is to be silenced, labeled as bad and avoided.

(Especially if the invitation towards difficult conversations and growth comes from a straight man.)

AKA: Let’s fix the world outside of me so I don’t have to feel the consequences of a lack of sovereignty over my mind, body and emotions.

Let’s attack those whose views contrast mine so that I don’t have to learn to navigate my own difficult emotions and articulate my thoughts so that I may communicate them in a healthy way.

The biggest blind spot present for women is the entitlement to a beautiful life without enough attention towards caring, nourishing and tending to their role in co-creating that beauty.

Spirituality is not a mask you put on, it is not the flowers, the dance and yoga moves, the half-naked shots and exciting book passages you share on social media..

It definitely is NOT hippy festivals, plant medicines and luxurious ceremonies.

Spirituality is not showing the world how pretty your flower is.

Spirituality is tending to the soil.

Turning shit into fertilizer.

Removing the weeds.

It is sweating under a midday, blazing sun’s heat as you kneel, covered in dirt, calloused hands by the relentless tending to your inner garden..

Free of expectations and full of love..

For you know that the morning fragrance and flowers’ bloom are but a small, beautiful side-effect of the work you have put in..

Knowing that the biggest and most beautiful blossoming is that which happens in the heart..

The heart of a woman who stopped expecting for life and others to take care of her, and in connection to her womb and divinity she remembered that it is through her that life sprouts.

And through her service of that life, she becomes deserving of all that is good.

The heart of a woman whose heart has blossomed upon realizing her truth, her power and her light..

As she simultaneously witnesses the grace and wealth that the world endlessly pours on a flower that shines so bright.

Spirituality is the beauty of a woman that has stopped anxiously waiting for somebody to ask her out to dance..

And has remembered -once and for all- she is music herself.

PS: In my fb group The Circle we explore practical, No-BS spirituality Themes like this in a lot more depth. Join if interested