Imagine that your head hurts..

If you go to a witch doctor, he’ll say you’ve been cursed (and proceed to up-sell you on the herbs/rituals to cure you)

If you go to a nutritionist, based on the latest food-fad they’ve been brainwashed into by their podcast of preference, they’ll preach for you to go raw-vegan, full-out carnivore, or something in-between.

The priest thinks it’s because Jesus is missing in your heart..

And the business guru, because you work an unfulfilling job and don’t make 7,8,9, 69 figures/year.

Even the lady from the corner shop will *confidently* reassure you that all you need is a few more crystals, sage and cacao.

This is one of the BIGGEST problems I see today:

Everyone’s got a hammer in their hand and any problem can easily be molded and worded to look like a nail.

(especially if there’s $$$ involved)

Perhaps ,for your headache, you just needed more water and sleep…

Yet you may end up getting the curse lifted, your nutrition revamped, a bible study group, a career shift and a new collection of crystals..

While the headache persists..

And -although I rarely consume other people’s content on fb (unless I’m working with/for them)- I have recently seen a massive wave of under-qualified, overgeneralized advice being vomited out.

Especially around relationships.

Every problem within a couple traced back to mommy and daddy issues, masculine and feminine energies, polarity being the holy grail of romantic intimacy, passion and forever-and-ever connection.

I do not discard the utility that polarity teachings have and the role this serves in improving a relationships.. in the same way I do not dismiss that a different diet, or even the witch doctor, may support the betterment of your health..

However, it’s important to remember that everyone has just one piece of the puzzle.

Your relationship cannot and SHOULD NOT be reduced to mere black and white philosophies.

Your problems may be because of imbalances in your energies, tension in the dynamic with your partner, childhood issues..

They may also be structural, social and cultural narratives that you’ve unconsciously allowed in.

Are you really not attracted to your partner? or are you running on an empty fuel due to your obsession with work?

Are you really in need of working with the magdalene priestess of rose coloured wealth-womb portals, or do you just need to rest and tend to your nervous system?

Do you need to become a hair-in-chest, macho barbarian, dominant, respect-demanding masculine warrior… or do you just need better communication skills?

Solutions are rarely found in single pockets of advice.

They are, instead, created by the gathering of different puzzle pieces..

Tending to your lifestyle, your community and your home..

As much as you do to your body, your heart and your soul..

As well as the intimacy and attraction with your partner.

So, before you jump blindly into following the teachings of the latest well-written, articulate fb gooroo, ensure that you (and them) keep an open mind..

Remembering that their solution is ONLY a recommended path, given their limited experience and inherent biases.

And that there aren’t silver bullets in life.

So be willing to explore alternatives, to reconsider your own assumptions and to dismiss what does not work.

Curiosity, commitment and patience – not blinded certainty – are the only keys bound to ensure your life and relationships are molded into their most beautiful possibilities.

The problem with most teachings and teachers is that they are more interested in fitting life into their molds, than they are in acknowledging the complexity of a problem -and with that their own limitations when it comes to being of service.

“It’s all about your feminine/masculine!” is a lot easier to mumble than “I honestly do not know.”

So take what you consume lightly

Yet choose your teachers firmly.