First, you have to acknowledge that we are different.
The way you think is not the way SHE thinks.
For most men, when his woman complains to him about something “trivial” he thinks “why is she so dramatic / annoying ?”
He forgot to take the trash out and she gives him a lecture.
It reminds him of his mother and he defends, he closes down and he judges her.
“Why does she make such a big deal out of nothing?” he may ask himself.
Men, I invite you to consider that every complaint and pain that the feminine feels in relationship to the masculine is a cry for consciousness.
Every fight reflects a moment when you dropped your consciousness.
She is NOT fighthing about the dishes, the garbage, about you forgetting that special date or that small thing that she mentioned long ago.
**NOT AT ALL!**
She is hurt because of your lack of consciousness.
She does not care about the garbage.
But she cares that you were not mindful and present enough to remember your commitments to her and your home.
She does not care about “that small silly thing that doesn’t matter”
She cares that her man is aware enough to not let these things slip.
She cares that her man keeps his word and honours it as sacred.
Her pain (that you experience as her complaint) is her way of reminding you of the standard she has for you.
A standard of care, mindfulness, awareness and deep penetrative consciousness.
The moment that your woman stops complaining to you is the moment she starts to disconnect emotionally.
She feels forced to take care of things and do what you said you were going to do but didn’t.
And no longer trusts her man to keep his word, to not forget, to take care of the details.
So if you are navigating conflict in your relationship with women,
that’s a good thing!
She still cares enough about you to call you out when you are not being the man she knows you can be.
And the moment you see her complaints as mirrors to those places where you are constantly disconnecting and dropping your consciousness,
you will see it as a gift.
Not as your mom’s punishment.
That is the moment you transcend from being a boy to being a man,
When a woman’s words and feedback feel edifying instead of controlling and ‘nagging’
Of course, there are some cases where her complaints have more to do with her and her own unprocessed emotions than with what you do.
But if you take this perspective, you will start to see conflict as a tool to fine-tune yourself as a man.
The rock that sharpens the knife.
And whatever happens after,
one thing is certain:
You’ll be a better man.