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Stop Robbing the World of Your Gifts!

⚔️ Are you done playing little boy games? ⚔️

When women reach a certain age her energies start feeling drawn to birthing a child and starting a family.

When men reach a certain age, the same thing happens.

But instead of a child, the legacy they want to leave in the world is not (necessarily) one of flesh and bones.

It is a legacy of service.

A dent in the universe that says “He walked this lands, and flowers grew and bloomed at every spot where he stepped…

This is the sign of maturity for a man.

For only when his life (and inner energies) have reached a certain level of stability and awareness, he is now able to look beyond himself (and his immediate desires and needs).

This is when the archetypal king energy starts descending upon (and bursting from within) him.

It is a subtle spiritual, metaphysical and energetic anointment that He goes through.

This is where he is ready to become a force of nature in this world.

An agent of profound, conscious change. A TRUE leader.

This is also when the inner boy is sent on his rite of passage, for giving birth to his vision will demand that he let go and dies to his old self.

Which is the scariest possibility and the most necessary one.

For he knows that only by jumping into the abyss and facing his fears head-on, will he ever find a chance at experiencing the full extent and power of who he is:

A Grounded, Masculine, Conscious Leader.

A Truth Warrior. ✊🏽

So, have you had enough yet?

Or you will keep procrastinating on bringing forth the transformation that the world NEEDS from you?

It’s about time you stop robbing the world of your gifts…

So let’s change that!

PS: If you are a man and you have been feeling the calling towards this transition, and are ready to embark in this quest together with a small group of badass, powerful allies – check out the upcoming Live (and online) events section.

The Secret to stop suffering (Men)

If you have achieved a decent amount of success and still feel that your life seems limited and constricted by a few underlying fears and anxieties, keep reading.

I bet that if it came down to it, you would have no problem jumping out of an airplane…

Or climbing and walking the edge of a very high mountain…

Or finding the stillness to touch a spider, snake or a ______ (insert animal people are often afraid of).

Most people imagine that these are the most common fears, and they are wrong. Facing these fears can be exciting but often of little consequence in one’s life, Why?

The fears that matter the most – and are most difficult to face – are not outside of us. They reside in your head, heart and body.

Some of these are:

  • The fear of speaking up.
  • The fear of heavy emotions (yours and others).
  • The fear of being alone.
  • The fear of failure.
  • The fear of rejection and abandonment.
  • The fear of an anxious mind.
  • The fear of hopelessness (which can be summed up as the fear of death & the fear of life).

It doesn’t matter how many figures are in your bank account at the end of the month if you’re still afraid to face what you’ve been running from. Financial freedom without internal freedom is one of the biggest pains a person will ever experience.

Because what’s the use of having money if you cannot fully enjoy it? A lot of cash is great, but if your relationship with your self and with others is fear-inducing you’re not better than a drug lord locked in jail.

You can count your assets all day long, but your experience of life will forever be limited, so what to do?

Well, if you want to FINALLY be able to enjoy the fruits of your hard work without the constant feeling of uneasiness (of not being good enough, of things heading towards failure, of not liking yourself) you need to face one fear. “The fear of your Self.

You must look within into every dark corner of your mind and heart. And not flinch at what may come up, nor judge, shame, attack or reject it. Simple (although not always easy)

Most overachievers drive comes from seeking an external relief to their inner chaos:

Their emotions and mind are in a storm and gaining mastery over the physical world (status, money, recognition, toys, friends and lovers) provides a temporary relief… An imaginary sense of peace and control. But you know it only lasts so long before those uncomfortable emotions come back up and your mind starts thinking what to conquer next.

However, life doesn’t have to be like this.

Walking this path is easier when you’ve got someone with a torch ahead of you, holding your hand when needed. Not because you can’t do it all alone, but because you know your time matters and you’re ready to sort this out for once.

So that the rest of your life becomes a constant celebration of your inner peace, bliss and joy.

And not an attempt to fill in a void.

Why do men procrastinate? and how to stop it.

Let’s start with understanding the word itself:
Pro Towards/Forward

Procrastination therefore means to be in pro of tomorrow (which makes it the close cousin of Regret).

Regret is to wish you acted differently in the past.

Procrastination is to assume you’ll act differently in the future.

Both of them stem from a man’s wounded relationship with the present moment.

He is then bombarded with motivational and inspirational posts that tell him just to *plow* and work hard through it all…

Or new-agey “go with the flow“, abstract and vague advice…

But in essence, what a man must do to deal with his procrastination is to face death.

He delays it until tomorrow because he takes today and tomorrow for granted, he is assured that he will have another day…

  • Another day to quit that job he hates and start doing something aligned with his purpose and deeper values.
  • Another day to delay sorting out his internal nonsense so he can find a girlfriend and have a loving relationship.
  • Another day to take care of his body and stop drinking, smoking, eating poorly.

And because he believes himself to be immortal, then today can wait.

But in reality it cannot, and it won’t. 

Not unless he faces one of these three things:

  • Excruciating Pain
  • Loss
  • Commitment
  1. Pain:
    Most men wait until their bosses fire them (after having sacrificed a big portion of their time and life serving a company that did not hesitate to let them go) to then start paying attention to what else they can do to make a living.

    Most men wait until illness, stress, cancer, depression and anxiety hits because this is when the pain of their mortality is brought to the surface – to a degree that he can no longer ignore it

  2. Loss:
    Most men wait until they lose their loved one, until they lose their “safety net” or until they reach a point where they feel they’ve started losing themselves.

  3. Commitment:
    Finally, very few men choose Commitment as their catalyst for transformation.

    This is because Pain and Loss are forced upon you, whereas Commitment is a personal choice.

    Commitment requires that you give up your excuses…
    – That you give up your distractions…
    – That you stop delaying things for another day that may never come…

    It requires that you throw yourself into a place where you have no choice but to grow, and commitment is rarely just personal.

Most of the time men need accountability, guidance, a support network and other men to talk to so they can be held up to a higher standard than they have for themselves.

So when a man is facing procrastination, the message he gives to himself and to the world is this:

My life (and what is REALLY important for me) can wait.

which is a subtle expression of unworthiness/undeserving but I won’t go into that.

You think life can wait

And life will show you that it cannot. It won’t.

For everything has to move and evolve, whether you do it by choice or by being forced, that’s up to you.

Pain and loss,

Or conscious commitment...

You have to get there eventually.

So why not do it now?

Do you have a good reason to NOT be planting the seeds of everything that you wish to sow tomorrow?

Do you not want to let go and die to the boy you’ve been so far so that you can welcome the man that you really are?

PS: If you enjoyed reading this, don’t forget to sign up for my Mindful Mondays Newsletter

Hyper-Individualism and Trauma

Hyper-Individualism is a form of trauma-coping.

Think about it!

We are the most dependent mammals in all of nature

We would not make it far without having someone to protect and provide for us during our childhood years.

Unlike most of the other animals who within a few months are often ready to walk away and hunt their own food.

So it is ingrained within us to seek for and thrive in the space of community.

Anyone who makes an effort to sell you on how you can (or should) do it all by yourself and just focus on you, you, you is certainly someone who at some point of their (career, relational, or family) life got so hurt by someone they loved that they made it a commitment to never get hurt again.

Which meant to never open up so much, trust so much, have so much faith or rely so much on others. To keep their heart safe not through embracing the core of its essence but by hiding it away and tucking it under their bed, far away from where it could be touched by others.

And you can live like this and make a decent fortune, also, I did in the past.

At the expense of living a less-than-full experience of life.

Stability at the expense of numbness. Individualism at the expense of fulfillment and wholeness.

It was okay. But I did not sign up for “okay“.

And if you are reading this, neither did you.

So let’s drop the pretence, and the facade and BS that we do not need each other.

Because the truth is that we do!

And when our trust for others is bigger than the feeling of them weighing on our shoulders..

something magical happens:

Conscious Leadership is born

Not as an endeavour of constantly pushing, forcing and working hard to make your dent on the world, but as a smooth, enjoyable, cooperative, inspiring and moving structure that will inevitable cause ripples of positive impact all around.

One of the biggest insights I recently had is knowing that I am not alone and that together, WE can!

Realizing that people can be trusted and in the light of genuine trust and honest guidance, they will surprise you and act in ways beyond what you thought they were capable of.

And they will surprise themselves at what they are capable of doing, when trusted. 🙂

Because at the core of someone who wants to be individualistic all you will find is a deeply ingrained fear of life and mistrust of God.

A life without faith, where no goodness can come unless they’ve earned it.

Leaving miracles and beauty outside of the picture… (for them)

And forgetting that even though they’ve put nothing towards it, every day the sun rises and setsand

the flowers bloom and the birds sing.

And they trust that life will provide, And without fault,

It ALWAYS does.

So how about YOU?

Do you trust?

Stop holding space, HOLD TIME instead.

You know how to hold space but, can you hold time?

In a world where everyone is trying to sell you shortcuts and “new” methods.

Trying to get you to quantum leap this, and quantum jump that..

(which in most cases are nothing but the “get-rich-quick” schemes of the self-development world.)

And I say most cases because in essence, it is possible.

I have seen miraculous transformations in front of my own eyes, consistently.

It is in fact a big part of the work that I do (and a solid punch that plant medicine is willing to provide to those who are open and ready to receive it).

However, it is not the norm.

And in most cases, the premise of accelerated growth comes at the expense of a person’s ability to fully integrate and embody their new Self.

Everyone is keen to hold space but when it comes to time, everyone wants to rush.

Nothing wrong with it, but in my experience, most “coaches” and “spiritual guides” out there are concerned with quick fixes for the wrong reasons.

They want their clients to have an overnight breakthrough more because it eases their own pain of seeing someone progress at a slower pace than because they know it will be of service to them.

The best thing in the world, at the wrong time, can become the biggest tragedy!

Have you forgotten that a rose takes its time to bloom?

And so does the sun to rise.

And every song you love, to be played.

Fastening the tempo could result in noise and disharmony.

It is because of this that it’s important that you learn to hold time

Which is another way of saying that it is best to have compassion, acceptance and gentle care for another person’s pace of growth.

Especially if you are a leader/coach or in a position of responsibility, your commitment is to serve the other.

And sometimes that means snapping your fingers and instantly destroying all their preconceived ideas of reality, shattering who they thought they were into a million pieces so they come in contact with the truth of who they are.

But sometimes to serve means to create a container of safety, patience and gentle guidance so they can ease into their own transformation.

For faster is not always better.

(Ask your wife about it if you doubt it 😉)

Jokes aside, I invite you to hold time with the same care with which you have learned to hold space:

  • Free of judgements.
  • Free of personal agendas.
  • Free of attachments.

So you can look at the flower in front of you and know that whether it blooms instantly, or it takes its time, you’ll be there to support its choices (and not your own).

To hold time is to be okay with the pace of growth of others and -ultimately- the world.

Understanding that your role as a guide is to extend a loving hand and help where you are needed

But never to toss and drag someone through the path… just because you want to show off that you know it well.


The day my life changed

Up until a few years ago I had a hard time feeling fulfilled. No relationship, income goal or life experience was good enough.

I spent a few years traveling through 30+ countries, cultivating beautiful romances in every port and earning well enough to not have to worry about work for most of the year.

But there was always this subtle craving for more, for a greener grass and a fuller glass.

Especially around women, money and experiences.

I thought I was trying to be more and more FREE, but little did I know I was enslaved to the very same craving I had for freedom.

Above all, I wanted to meet a woman with whom I felt such a profound love that it would inspire me to let go of the searching altogether.

And in the process of keeping my mind and attention on what could be, I missed what was.

I hurt women that had been nothing but a glimpse of heaven in my life.

I’d go years without seeing my family back in Colombia.

I (unconsciously) co-destroyed the relationship I had then and turned a beautiful love story into suffering, chaos, deceit and ugliness.

And it was the pain of this loss the very same pain that forced me to pay attention and see what I had been creating.

I looked back and saw myself:

A little boy so scared of not being able to receive enough from life…

  • Afraid of not being loved.
  • Afraid of not having enough.
  • Afraid of not being enough.

A boy in so much pain and fear of loss that he unconsciously destroyed all the beautiful things that had come into his path.

Because if this woman in front of him was not “good enough” for him, he would not have to truly open his heart.

He would not have to look at what within himself was holding him back from feeling and experiencing and receiving the love he craved so much.

I remember spending a whole day curled up in bed and sobbing for hours.

I started to see flashes of everything I had lived, every romance I had experienced, and how in spite of all of it, I had not let any of it in.

I was a thirsty boy sitting with his back to a beautiful oasis, looking at the desert dunes and wondering if there might be water somewhere else…

That day changed my life.

Realizing that life had over-delivered, and it was me who never received it.

Not fully, not with both arms.

It’s not that the women, the places, the experiences were not good enough…

It’s that there was not enough good within me.

And how to see in another something that I had not seen in myself? How to receive from somebody something that I deprived myself from?

That day was the day I realized what responsibility meant.

Taking ownership for my experience of life and realizing that I was the only one getting in my own way.

I wrote forgiveness letters to women whose hearts I had hurt, friends and family whose love I had taken for granted, and one to myself too.

Apologizing for what I had done, forgiving myself for having done it, and committing to something new.

And life changed.

I started to TRULY fall in love with myself, and very soon with life itself.

I came home to myself and to this moment and realized that only HERE and NOW I could fully receive all that life had in store for me.

And it has been overdelivering ever since.

What if the universe had waaay more in store for you than your limited grasping could ever help you take by your own means?

What if the love, the peace and the prosperity that you so desire is a lot closer than what your striving would make you believe?

Are you ready to receive it? Fully and vulnerably?

or will you continue rejecting the very same thing that you desire?

The choice is yours.

The Difference Between Desire and Neediness

Desire comes from the body, neediness from the mind.

Like hunger and gluttony.

One is natural – the other can never be satisfied and only burries you deeper into a spiral of self consciousness.

Desire is wanting without expectation. Neediness is attachment to an expected outcome.

Desire is our truth. Neediness our sickness.

Desire is a claim of the abundant. Neediness reflects needs not met.

Desire is a gift of presence and appreciation. Neediness is a debt. It places the weight of our joy on the other and their reactions.

Desire is life force flowing through you. Neediness is your disconnection from this force.

Desire is the universal fire moving you towards expansion. Life wanting to experience itself. Neediness is attachment to wanting life to be the way we want, a refusal of what is.

But it is also human!

Would you judge yourself if after food deprivation, you rushed to binge eat at a buffet?

Or when close to dying of thirst, you’d chug jar after jar of water to the point of sickness?

Neediness is only a symptom of a need not being met.

Shedding light on something you have not taken care of within you.

If you crave love, you’re love deprived and you could use loving yourself and filling your own cup first.

If you crave approval and validation, you’re deprived of personal meaning and you could use some time in solitude and facing death – to come to terms with jow ephemeral life is (and how insignificant other’s opinions are)

If you crave money, you’re deprived of flow. Nature is rich beyond limit. You could use a lot more trust and appreciation for the already existing abundance within you.

So I invite you to shake hands with your Neediness through compassion – and to feed your soul what it needs, before you shortchange yourself and go seeking for temporary, cheap, 2nd class solutions.

It is only when we stop outsourcing our inner well being that we can then be of contribution to others.

Tension: Life’s Greatest Gift

The greatest challenge today is that most people have become uncomfortable with discomfort.

Therefore healthy tension is turned into something to be avoided.

The world is full of people with all kinds of sensitivities, whose lives are so small that their peace of mind and emotional world revolves around every small thing others do and say.

Imagine to live in such slavery:

Where the key to your inner, well-being has been freely handed to anyone with something to say.

To still believe that your experience of life depends on what others say or not, the words they use, the political party they support, the God they worship, their stance on masks, vaccines and so on…

Life IS tension.

Think about it!

Child-birth is one of THE MOST tense experiences a human being can go through – and that is the process of life itself.

Building muscles at the gym requires that you put them through enough tension day in and day out.

The same goes for you.

Any life worth living will require that you face a vast amount of tension, so at the end of the day you only have two choices:

To try and control the world, police what they say and do, the words they use, their beliefs and expression, and try to force the world into not stepping near your insecurities and sensitivities so you don’t get offended…

Or you can have personal agency.

You can become a sovereign being, willing to step into discomfort, willing to embrace conflict and disagreements.

Forever remembering that you cannot control the world for there’s too many variables…

But that in your inner world only YOU are the variable, and you can make that a beautiful place.

A place to live in and to live from.

This is freedom.

And it is found through embracing those emotions that are difficult to face (within ourselves first and then with others.)

And understanding that underneath it all, it is okay.

and you are always bigger than any challenge you face because of it.

Not in spite of it.

The Biggest Pain Successful Men Feel

Nothing is more painful to a “successful man” than knowing that despite having what it takes…

What it takes to create life on his terms…

What it takes to turn visions into actions, dreams into realities..

He still feels completely disconnected from all of it.

Creating his ideal life yet feeling empty and subtly sedated.

A lot of guys suffer their misfortune, their incapabilities, their lack of drive, imagination and skill.

But to suffer your genius, your power and your own creation, that’s a different level of pain right there!

I know because I have felt it.

I penetrated my way through life until it showered me with everything I had always desired:

Money doing what I loved,

A beautiful, loving partner,

A fit, healthy body...

Yet there I was – wondering why deep inside I still felt unfulfilled.

Why despite so much beauty surrounding me, I could not truly FEEL it.

I could not feel deep ecstasy for my work – instead I only saw and thought about the next $ milestone.

I could not feel my woman fully – instead, we had grown distant, constantly arguing as I kept thinking about other women.

Having way too much, I still could not feel I had had enough of anything.

But one thing I knew:

I could NOT keep going like this without sacrificing and destroying everything I had worked so hard to create.

Can you relate?

Wanting greener grasses you conquered the whole mountain.

Yet somewhere along the road, your heart closed down.

Your mind took over and helped you plan, execute and focus on what you felt was important.

And you kicked ass at it!

Meanwhile your heart took the backseat.

Your emotions waited in the side-lines while tasks and achievements piled up.

What’s a sunset worth to him that – despite having eyes – has forgotten how to fully witness it?

There’s just so much you can play this game before you burn out.

Before your relationship dies a slow, painful death.

Before your work dries the life out of you.

And you end up with a fully crossed to-do list, several 0‘s on your bank account, a beautiful house but nowhere to be felt – the true feeling of being at home.

(Neither there or within yourself.)

You are NOT alone.

As men, we were never raised to know what it FEELS to be in connection with our hearts and emotions. In some cases, we were even shamed for feeling (sad, angry, overwhelmed, vulnerable).

Real, tough men suck it up! – right?

Well, sucking it up leads to pushing it down, and in the process, you let yourself and those you say you “love” down.

Because you are all over life without ever fully letting life in.

Doing a lot and barely feeling any of it.

All grind and no grace… All hustle and no heart…

The truth is that there’s a deeper experience of life waiting for you to let it in!

An experience that doesn’t involve one more accomplishment on your end,

But it will require more courage than any of your business wins.

Because it is not a process of amassing and gathering, it is one of:

  • Breaking open
  • Releasing.
  • Unlearning.
  • Uncovering.
  • Dis-covering.

De-armoring all the walls you’ve carefully built around your heart.

But one thing I promise you:

At the other side, you will find your self.

Which is what you’ve been (perhaps unknowingly) looking for all these years.

At the other side, you fully come home to your heart, body and life.

A life so profound and fulfilling that you’ll cry tears of appreciation and bliss on a continuous basis.

Learning to see your woman with fresh eyes every morning.

And bowing down in gratitude for your ways of making a living..

You will finally take a leap.

The most important one in your path:

You will go from being a boy chasing a successful life,

to being a Man that lives a sacred one.


How to learn to receive love?

A few weeks ago I hurt my middle-upper back.

The pain was not very heavy, however it was enough for me to feel concerned so I decided to get it treated right away – which ended up in one of the most beautiful lessons I’ve had recently.

I went to my yoga instructor and shared how coming back from living in the Colombian mountains where I’d wake up around 6 am with the birds, shower with ice-cold pure, crystalline waterfall water and be in nature all day.

And into a high-rise condo downtown Toronto where the energy of the city is very dense, neighbours are constantly drilling and renovating spaces, sirens going on throughout the streets and the security guards being called with “noise complaints” because I was “Om’ing” too loud…

This had taken a toll on me. I felt like I was carrying unnecessary weight.

Which was aided by long hours of poor laptop working posture. And resulted in the back pain I was now feeling.

She is a movement therapist and started twisting and pulling my body to release the tension I was feeling. At one point she said:


And notice how your breath is not you forcing the atmosphere to come inside of you, but instead, a process of allowing the existing pressure to fill in your lungs…

“There’s nothing you need to do, as breathing is life itself pouring into and through you. Just allow it…


I could not stop thinking about this, that to breathe is not a forceful action. It is the allowing of immense external atmospheric pressures to pour life energy into us.

And I realized that LOVE is no different.

That most of the time we are out there trying to make love happen, trying to create the perfect scenario, circumstances…

Without realizing that all we have to do is let it push itself into us.

Because that is the nature of the way in which love flows.

NEVER by forcing. Just by removing all that we have created that gets in the way of it pouring itself in.

Which is the ultimate spiritual journey:

Getting out of our own way.

Emptying our cup so that something greater can pour itself.

As long as we are full of ourselves, we will always run out and inevitably end up dry.

For we are limited, but the essence of life is not.

And when you open up to that source of energy to pour itself through you, there’s no bottom to the overflow of your cup.

No limit to how much you can give!

But it cannot happen by force, You must we willing to let it in.

Just like the air that you now breathe 🙂


Private Ayahuasca Ceremonies

Last month one of the Shamans that works with us held a private ceremony for the CEO of an International Bank.

He wanted privacy for obvious reasons.

He’s a very well known and influential man so his career (and how his peers perceive him) could be negatively impacted if they knew he had decided to drink ayahuasca.

So he did not want to risk having someone take pictures and for his participation in this healing process to go mainstream.

But also, he had the resources and realized that if he was going to drink medicine, he would feel a lot safer and more comfortable having the Shaman’s undivided attention (as well as the facilitators’ focused support).

He did not want to be worried about what could happen or whether people would judge him. He wanted to go deep and did not want to hold back – so he felt safer exploring the darkest parts of himself without any strangers around him.

Long story short, he had a profound experience of healing and coming back to himself.

What he thought life was, its meaning and his purpose were flipped upside down (in a good way)

So much that he already decided to come back with his partner and his family.

Why am I sharing this?

Two reasons:

The first reason, to shine light on the fact that the “world leaders” (although I do not like to refer to them as such) are waking up.

People of influence, bankers, politicians and entrepreneurs are all coming to the realization that deep peace, joy and a life of meaning cannot be achieved through power, money or external success.

Those things will bring you comfort – lots of it!

And freedom to buy a lot of varied experiences.

But never fulfillment.

In conversations with 7+ figure earners I have seen them bursting with anxiety and fear upon encountering a problem that won’t get solved instantly by just throwing money at it.

Wealthy men and women finally feeling and getting in touch with so much pain that was hiding deep inside.

Realizing that a big part of their life had been spent in addiction and distraction, trying to find hobbies, activities and chasing “peak high” experiences to try and numb this pain.

And I have seen them flip the switch (for the better!)

Because a person of influence and resources, once connected to his/her heart, becomes an unstoppable force of nature.

Powerful change-makers whose skills and competence start being oriented towards the greater good.

They become the people history talks about. People whose legacy goes on forever.

So as ugly and dark as the media may be painting the world to be – there’s a deep awakening happening at all levels.

There’s work to do, yes, but the path ahead is very promising ✊🏽🔥

The second reason I’m sharing this is because I’m excited to announce that we have decided to start publicly offering Tailored / Private plant medicine retreats.

So whether it is your marriage you’re seeking to heal and reignite…

Or your family you want to bring closer together...

Your employees/business partners you want to align with at a way deeper level...

Or your coaching clients you’d like to treat 🙂

I’m happy to explore with you what it is you are seeking, so we can co-create a private, tailored experience that will become the biggest gift you give to yourself (and your loved ones) this year.

How to stop “being stuck”

  • A mission you care for (a purpose) 📍
  • A reliable map towards that treasure (a path) 🗺
  • A reason that makes it all worth it (pressure or a promise) 🔥

Let me explain in a bit more depth…

 ⚜️ Purpose:

Imagine you are driving your car and suddenly your eyes were blindfolded and there was no clarity of where you are going.

What’s the first thing you do?

Stop. Right?

Because moving without a purpose, without knowing the direction in which you are going, is inherently dangerous.

A lot of men feel stagnant because they are actually unclear about their purpose, unclear about their projects and often unclear about their very own potential.

⚜️ Path:

Imagine you know where you are and where you’re going, but you look in front of you and all you see is a maze.

There are 5 different roads ahead of you. And while you could enjoy the trip and its detours, you are a man who values his time.

So you have very little tolerance to waste any of it.

Meaning that you want to ensure that the road you take is the one that guarantees you’ll arrive to your destination, and that you’ll do so efficiently.

If you know where you’re going and your purpose, yet you still feel stagnant it’s because your path is unclear.

There may be many possible paths in front of you and it makes you doubt.

Some of the paths seem more reliable than others but you don’t know for sure.

Some may be empty promises.

But the fact is that you must choose and start your journey.

A lot of men reach stagnation because they lack a path they FULLY trust and can commit to. So they stay in “indecision” land for way too long.

⚜️ Pressure / A Promise:

If you know where you are going and you have placed the correct GPS coordinates that hand you a clear path towards that purpose… yet you still feel stagnant.

It’s because you lack pressure (or a promise).

In other words, you either don’t have (or are not clear enough) about YOUR WHY.

And beyond that, about YOUR COMMITMENT.

You only commit to what is important for you (a promise) Or away from what hurts (pressures).

If there is nothing both pulling you or pushing you forward, it takes a man of immense willpower to move by his own choice.

And let’s be honest, 

Most of us are not built like that. 🤔

We like fire on our ass and an oasis right in front. 🔥

And this is okay, because there are many ways that promises and pressures can be organically created to add extra steam to the engine.

Most men who have a clear purpose and path, and have not done anything with it.

Lack the necessary involvement, investment, accountability, promises and pressures to force them to get going.

So if something in your life feels stagnant (your relationship with women, your relationship with work, your relationship with your Self)

Inquire which of these 3 are you avoiding.

Ask yourself:

Would I benefit of a clearer Purpose?” 

or “A cleaner path?

or “A deeper promise and extra pressure?

And start there.

Leadership is a dance – to lead, there must be a follower.

Therefore it is NOT merely a masculine quality. It is an existential one (like gravity)

To lead consciously means that there is harmony between the masculine and the feminine.

The masculine creates structure and direction while the feminine provides flow, feedback and energy.

However, it is the feminine that inspires the masculine to bring her where she wants to go. Therefore “leadership” relies on a harmonic relationship between these two poles.

Most people think that a leader is the guy doing public speaking, running a company or building a business.

But the truth is that leadership goes far deeper than that.

The dance starts within you.

If your masculine is overdeveloped, you’ll end up becoming a tyrant to yourself and those around you. Leading through force. Achieving through constant sacrifices, burnt out and hustle.

Prioritizing goals over emotions.

If on the other hand, your feminine is overdeveloped, your emotions will end up running the show. You may become a bit too passive, always going with the flow and constantly changing your mind.

Prioritizing emotions over goals.

So conscious leadership is when we are able to understand our own internal composition and address that which needs balance.

Because your unconscious will ALWAYS reach towards that point of balance, but it may do so in unawareness/disconnection.

When you are unconsciously trying to reconnect to your feminine, you will find yourself craving addictive tendencies, emotional rushes, instant gratification (which are shadow forms of nourishment).

When you are unconsciously trying to reconnect to your masculine, you will find yourself becoming rigid, strict, objectifying people (everyone, including you, becomes a mean to an end), and seeking outlets to be controlling. (OCD tendencies for example).

See, your body is very wise and it knows when something needs balance…

And it will move you towards it in whatever way possible. Which isn’t always the most conscious one. 

So if you want to understand what true leadership is, 

and how to impact the world AT LARGE.

You must understand this dance within you, so you can tango better with others when the moment comes.

How to believe in yourself

I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me…” 

This is the most common regret men have on their deathbed (according to thousands of surveyed deaths). But that’s just the adorned version of the truth…

What they meant to say was:

I wish I had what it took, I wish I had ‘the balls‘, I wish I hadn’t been so scared, I wish I did it!

NOTHING burns deeper than the pain of regret, and no regret is bigger than that of a wasted life:

A mediocre, half-assed, fear-controlled life.

A could have, should have, but chickened-out and didn’t kind of life.

Working for someone else at a job that YOU KNOW is not aligned.

Robbing the world from sharing your voice, your gifts and your TRUE heart-called service.

Timidly approaching women and fearfully making love to them.

In essence: A limp fuck.


I don’t think so, just honest and cutting through the BS.

Life is waiting for you to bend it over and fill it in with all you’ve got.

Your woman and your purpose are waiting for the moment you’ll make up your mind and do so too.

And you can always choose to distract and postpone making a decision,

Going through another one of your okay-ish relationships, average sex, okay income, barely-tolerable career, smoking, playing videogames, scrolling through social media and just consuming entertainment.

But you know that underneath that, there’s a calling you have been ignoring, and it is starting to transition from a whisper into a full fledged scream.

A scream that another yoga practice, another workshop, another 6-weeks sprint or 90 days process will NOT silence.

A scream that demands that you let go of who you are right now, in many ways, and make room (and trust) for a bigger, truer version of yourself to come forth.

A death and rebirth of sorts.

Your untapped potential and core energies can either create or destroy, and every day that goes by you are either closer to birthing your purpose on this earth…

Or closer to destroying your body, relationships and peace of mind because of your pervasive hesitation

But one thing is certain:

The quickest way towards a renewed sense of self, confidence and to a FULL life transformation is NEW RESULTS. Different from your old.

You don’t need to believe in yourself when you KNOW yourself.

When you have – experientially – seen and explored what you are capable of. You can sit and read another book, join another group, attend another 3-days workshop…

But until you start taking care and moving forward in those areas that you’ve been ignoring, renunciating at the life you have now so you can take a leap of faith into the one that is calling you.

Until you do this,

you’re doomed to die full of regrets.

This is not pessimism, it’s being objective and truthful.

Most men postpone their dreams until they turn in death-bed regrets. A few others, take it into their own hands and realize that the best time to plant a tree was 30 years ago. and the second best time is NOW.

So what will you choose?

Do you keep postponing living YOUR life until it is too late (knowing there’s nothing worse than ‘too late’?)

Or do you grab life by the hair, with a smirk and a plan

And unleash your creativity all over? In deep, conscious, loving service and leadership.

The choice is yours.

When you flow, there’s no need to force

Most of the time a man feels stuck is NOT because he is incompetent.
In fact, it tends to be because he is confused and lacks clarity.

If you were driving around and suddenly your eyes were blindfolded, what’s the first thing you would do?

You’d push the brakes completely because anything else is either dangerous or could take you in the wrong direction.

Most men are labeled a lot of ugly names, made to feel shame if they embrace their masculine power, made to feel shame if they embrace their feminine one, judged if they’re single-minded go-getters just as much as if they are couch potatoes.

This has a lot of men feeling like there’s no place to go, and nowhere they can play a game where they can actually (and fully) win.

But let’s make this quick.

Brother, what you are lacking is not strength or capability.
What you may be lacking is clarity and commitment.

These two elements are what an aligned vision (purpose) provides you with.

When you have a vision that moves every cell in your heart, you can’t help but to move in that direction.

You know where you’re going and you can’t help to constantly move in that direction.

Like an apple tree that can’t help but to give you apples, once the time comes.

In fact, the vision (when aligned) comes with its own supply of energy – so there’s no need to hustle, will power through it or force yourself into unsustainable waves of fake discipline.

Procrastination is often the side-effect of an absent vision, because when you know where you’re going, you flow.

When you flow, there’s no need to force.

You allow for life to come towards you, instead of chasing your own tail endlessly.

Once you are clear on your vision, you realize – like the flower – that there’s a particular scent that is yours and yours only, and that you can’t help but share that fragrance with the world.

Now, the question remains – how to find (or how to embark consciously in) an ALIGNED and magnetic vision?

The age old “what’s my passion/purpose?” departure point.

I’ll leave you with that,

However, it is the most important question to tend to, otherwise you are doomed to either stay stuck…

or to drive with a blindfold on, which means that your life turns into a disaster waiting to happen.

Accidents, drama, pain and loss ensue.

This moment that you are living is not a tragedy, it is a blessing

Many years ago I used to do laundry, clean floors and toilets for a living.

I did not want to work for someone else so I rented two condos and put them on airbnb and managed them.

Which meant changing bedding, cleaning kitchens, toilets and floors on an ongoing basis.

I preferred doing this than using my BComm degrees to get a “proper” corporate job – at least here I owned my time. 

At the end of the month I’d be left with $3-$5k which was all I needed back then to live comfortably.

Then one day I had some guests that got drunk and thought it was a great idea to go skinny dipping in the outdoor swimming pool.

Security found them and they threw me under the bus – so management found out about my Airbnb listings, which happened to be forbidden in the condo.

I got a “first and last notice” from my landlord, so overnight I had to shut everything down and sit at home wondering what I’d do to earn money.

I had been sporadically tattooing as a side hobby for some time, and scrolling on Instagram I saw a studio that was hiring just down the street.

I sent my portfolio and within a few weeks I started working there, earning $2-$4k per month, which was great since I was not cleaning toilets anymore.

A few months into it, I realized that this studio was run in a way that conflicted with my values.

There was hypocrisy, drama, dishonesty and a permeating focus on milking the client for money and the Artists for work.

The studio kept 60% of every tattoo I made (even if I brought in the client through my own means) and I was promised to go 50/50 after a trial month, but after 8 months the owner was still making up excuses about why I did not deserve the raise.

One time telling me straight up:You and your art are just not there yet. You’re not worth 50%.

I later found out he was stealing money from the artists so I decided I did not want to be there anymore, and quit.

He threatened to sue me, delayed a few months paying me back my last month worth of work and so much more. I thought it would end up in a fist-fight.

It felt like leaving a toxic, abusive, controlling relationship.

So once again, I came home and sat on my bed wondering what to do next – and I figured I’d give it my best shot at trying to run my own studio.

Right away, the quality of my work improved and so did the quality of my clients.

I was no longer working for someone else, so every decision and creative spark was not limited by a bottleneck I couldn’t control.

And I was dedicated, committed and responsible.

It wasn’t long until I started earning in one day what I used to earn in a whole month…

At that point, where there was nothing I could no longer afford, I reached point zero.

Some people imagine that when you’re earning multiple 6-7 figures then you have reached the destination.

My experience was that my actual journey STARTED there.

Because it was in the absence of scarcity and in the peace of mind that came from knowing I would never go through lack in my life, that money truly stopped being a thing I’d think about.

And in that space, the things that REALLY mattered started coming to light:

Relationships and Purpose.

I realized that I would go weeks without seeing anyone but clients

And that my tattoo work, although I loved it and it was fun, lacked the sense of fulfilment and depth that my coaching work had.

I realized that in my quest towards stability, I had sacrificed a lot of my relationships and a lot of what was meaningful to me.

So it was point zero because now I knew. 

Not because I read it in some inspirational instagram meme “Money doesn’t buy happiness” 

But because I lived it and felt it and saw it by myself.

So I started tattooing less and focused on learning, writing, teaching, traveling and coaching more.

And I realized that all of what I went through, had to happen.

Otherwise, I would be doing this kind of work for the wrong reasons.

My motivation would have been fear of lack, instead of love through service.

Fast forward ahead, I was supposed to visit Colombia for 17 days last year (and then head to Bali, Romania and Europe to speak at some events) when covid hit – so I was caught in Colombia.

Being locked down in a small apartment ended up “forcing me” to go into the mountains and live with a shaman in a plant medicine (Aya) community.

By then I had been doing really intense Saddhana for years and had been holding my sexual energy for months.

So during my work one night, I died (at least that’s what it felt like) and reached a state of Satori / Moksha. (final union/enlightenment)

It was a state where the veils had been fully lifted and the game ended, in that place I was free to choose to not come back and stay one with source.

It was the most difficult decision of my life but I chose to stay (to keep a promise I had made with myself)

So I was asked “Okay, you want to come back, for what?

And I saw in a flash the movie of my life playing in front of my eyes, coming back to a body that feels pain, to an identity that has flaws, to a mind that does not understand things, to a relationship that is sometimes challenging, and to eventual aging and death (in detail, how, where, what age, etc.)

And after seeing that I still decided to make it back here.

I made a solid commitment that I would make every single one of those days count, for there wouldn’t be another way of justifying leaving that place of eternal love, light and bliss.

In that exact moment the Shaman started singing a song called “Espíritu del agua” where he sings to and summons all of the elemental spirits. 

I started feeling how this reality started putting itself back together, from pure energy and into matter – through the 5 elements.

I was laying down on the ground, next to the fire, and as I finally stood up, a big black scorpion walked from right underneath me.

I was laying on it the whole time and it could’ve stung me but it didn’t.

I couldn’t help but to think that it was ready to deal the killing blow, had I made a different choice.

So why come back? 

Well, I realized that every time in my life what I thought was a tragedy was instead a hidden blessing to me and those around me.

The couple that got drunk and forced me to end my Airbnb business, gifted me the chance to make a living from my arts.

The owner of the studio that was greedy and did not appreciate my art, gifted me the courage to do things on my own.

The abundant finances that had me sacrifice relationships and made me feel very empty, gifted me a solid starting point for a spiritual search.

The covid lockdown that closed airports and economies, gifted me the time to go all-in on my inner work.

And the experience of death, gifted me a sense of renewed, profound meaning and appreciation towards life.

The “tragedy” of being alive, of being human, flawed, emotional, confused at times is a gift in its essence.

So if you are going through what seems like a detour, keep going.

There are no detours, for all roads lead to the same place.

And what you feel is karma in one moment, becomes grace in the next.

For what would there be to do, if it was all already perfect?

And what couldn’t you do, if you realized that you already are?

Obsessed with God?

One of our biggest problems is that we’ve become obsessed with God.

In the quest towards the divine we’ve forgotten the human.

The matter.

The dense.

We live wanting to get out of here and therefore postponing taking care of the “here”.

Often worshipping imaginary friends and destroy a tangible nature, that very practically is the one gifting us life.

Don’t believe me?

Go without food or water for a week and feel into it yourself.

You’ve become obsessed with the third eye, the crown chakra, the higher realms, the places of heaven…

And along the way you have forgotten about the lower ones:

You’ve forgotten to take care of your relationship with sex and with your romantic partners in a healthy way.

You’ve forgotten to trust your body and instincts when it comes to situations and people that aren’t good for you.

You’ve abandoned your agency over your life and outsourced your personal power, very often getting to a place where you’re barely making meets end.

What if this was heaven?

And you die to realize that you missed your chance, because you thought something else was to come?

This is the place where you get to create, to experience, to feel, enjoy, laugh and cry!

This is the place where you can make anything out of yourself – if you commit to it.

But most people won’t.

Because they think there’s something better somewhere.

They’ve been following and staring at “the light” for so long that they’ve gone blind.

In the quest to a better life, they’ve abandoned the one they were gifted.

In a quest to understand ourselves, we have forgotten that Matter, matters.

PS: If you enjoyed this post, you may enjoy reading about THE BEAUTY OF BEING HUMAN or also this post here, about spirituality THROUGH humanity (and not bypassing it)

Why Does Pain Exist?

We are raised to follow the light and fight the dark, and this is a problem! 🔥
For life is not 24hrs of sunshine and rainbows.

And neither all darkness and mystery.

Mother nature is not only warm ocean breezes and cuddly puppies.

It is the storm, the hurricane and the plague.

And this is perfect.

Some of us learn to evolve through inspiration.

We listen to the whispers of the wind and the singing of the birds and we find our direction.

Some of us learn to evolve through desperation.

When the pull of the light doesn’t move us, the push of the darkness intercedes:






But what would it be of our life without these?

I have yet to meet a person who has come to a place of peace and power within, who did not get there after the darkest of times.

In fact, we are who we are not in spite of the pain we’ve endured but because of it.

I wouldn’t change a bit of the pain I’ve lived through.

I’m eternally grateful to the negative situations and the contrast the darkness gave me.

I also wouldn’t wish it on anybody.

Expansion and evolution are the flow of life.

Will be surf the wave by following our inner pulls?

Or wait until everything outside of us is on fire to wake up?

Every road leads to the same place.

But some roads are full of beautiful gardens.

And some others of mud and swamps.

The choice is ours ✊🏽

But know that whether inspiration or desperation, light or darkness, beauty or misery, they’re all here to help you.

They’re here to take a stand for the person you know you are but are holding back on.

Welcome it all.

Embrace it.

And then let it go, for the source of light and darkness is the void.

The center.

The place of balance.



Alignment, from within and not with the extremes. +/-


Where do you stand?

How to heal Addictions?

In a recent conversation with someone very close to me who has been struggling with an eating disorder for quite some time, we explored her “addiction” and how to work through it.

This may be useful to you if you’re battling an addiction or if you’re supporting someone who is going through one.

In her case, the first thing to understand was this:

Food is NOT a problem.

Food is NOT your problem.

Food is THE solution.

Let me explain…

When we acknowledge that we have a problem with food (either indulging too much or fiercely avoiding it) we are basically in the middle of an addictive pattern.

You can replace food with alcohol, drugs, sex, work, exercise and even books!

An addiction is whatever we are using to disconnect, numb and distance ourselves from reality.

The opposite of addiction is connection.

Addiction numbs, connection feels.

Addiction bypasses and ignores, Connection sits with, understands and loves.

However, addiction is not a “bad” thing.

Addictions are NOT the problem!

That’s right.

Alcohol, food, sex and even drugs are not the problem.

They are only unsustainable and unconscious solutions that our body and mind have found to cope with a deeper issue.

Our addiction is THE SOLUTION that we have found to navigate a larger problem.

It is just not a very good one.

In my friend’s case, we explored that food for her was not the problem.

Food was the way in which she found comfort, pleasure and instant satisfaction.

Thinking about food, overeating, worrying about food, and so on… make it very easy for people to think they have a food problem.

I asked her the following questions:

” What do you not have to deal with, look at or feel when you’re focused on food? “

” What is the emotion that has you think and obsess about food? “

” What is your body really asking you for in those moments? “

Only by sitting with these questions and exploring what her body, mind and soul really want moment to moment she will be able to address the core issue.

It may be that she feels an enormous amount of weight and anxiety because of the current situation and her family challenges, and food provides a handy, quick comfort.

If that’s the case, working on sourcing her sense of security, safety and trust from within are the only ways in which she’ll stop unconsciously resorting to food.

Perhaps she’s overwhelmed by the lack of direction in her life, the lack of clarity around what she wants to do mixed with her inner desire to be seen, to be impactful, to matter…

And then food provides not only comfort but it literally makes you a “bigger” person. It makes you more noticeable, easily seen, it gives you more matter.

The opposite is also true – when we are afraid of taking space in the world – our body will adapt to reflect that.

Do you see where I’m going?

Food (or any addiction) is the cheap solution that we’ve temporarily found to a deeper challenge that we are facing.

And until we face that challenge, the addiction will persist.

Until we provide our body and heart with a healthier and conscious way of navigating the situation, it will do what it can to find whatever readily available solution.

So as long as she focuses on food as the problem, she will (and actually has) spend years of her life chasing her own tail.

Trying to fix something that is not broken.

Paying for help and placing her attention on the smoke instead of the fire.

So what do we do when facing an unhealthy habit?

1) You realize that this addiction is not a problem. It is the solution you found to something else and acknowledge it and thank it for trying to take care of you.

Zero judgement is necessary before we go to the next step.

2) Compassion and exploration. You ask yourself the deeper questions and you listen – no matter how uncomfortable it gets.

Next time you feel the compulsion to indulge in _____, you slow down, ask yourself what is really going on and go down the rabbit hole.

There may be a lot of things we’ve been brushing under the carpet and we must learn to sit with the pain and anxiety in order to understand it.

3) Once we understand the root of the pain and disconnection, we start working on healing it.

We can do it on our own or ask someone experienced to support and guide us through the process. It is important to not bypass and address every emotion, sensation and situation that comes up.

We do this until we’ve reached a point of acceptance and self love – where we no longer judge our addiction but understand it and embrace the process that happened and why it happened.

4) Integration.

NOW we are ready for new, conscious and focused action.

We become curious about healthier alternatives and structures that can support our healing process. If the addiction was linked to toxic relationships, this is the time to end them.

If it was linked to a lack of self-care, this is the moment when we implement a self-care plan.

This is where emotion meets direction – Where feelings and planning cooperate in order to integrate what we have learned.

You can’t skip any step.

If you jump straight into action without working through the emotional layers first, you will feel like you’re running uphill.

We must acknowledge our emotional world so there is space and release.

It is only on a blank canvas that we are fully able to paint something new and create the beautiful picture that we choose.

So remember, your addictions are not the problem.

They are often a nudge that your body and mind are giving you, so you can slow down and care enough to look at the real issue.

They are the way your body has learned to survive and cope with a reality that perhaps you didn’t know how to navigate better at the time.

So don’t overthink them.

Thank them instead.

Accept. Understand. Love.

And only then, you’ll be ready to let go.

Your Expectations may be impairing your Growth.

One of the biggest challenges towards transformation is the expectation of fireworks when it happens.

Let me explain.

From a young age we learn that every big and meaningful step we take is defined by a “big celebration” or an important date.

When we graduate from a school year, there is a time where we get our grades and our invitation to advance in that system, and at the end of it, a big diploma and a celebration.

When we get married, we celebrate our commitment to our loved one on that special date surrounded by family and friends.

When we get our first job, our first raise, our first dog, our first kid, our first house – in every situation there are defined dates, rituals and practices that demark a before and after.

Nothing wrong with that!

The issue comes when in our personal transformation, we expect that same thing.

Most people who are interested in healing and exploring their shadows get caught up in the chase towards “THE cathartic release” – that big moment where a wave of emotions will come out unexpectedly and wash away your insecurities, your pain and your grief.

In fact, very often we judge the power of a teacher or a practice by the intensity of it – meaning that if it makes us cry, shake or feel very intense emotions, then it must be the real deal!

And the problem is that this is a human conditioning, not a spiritual one.

Energetically we only have life and death as “THE” big days.

And even then, they are only big and important to our human eyes.

For us they define a beginning and end. (while in reality, there is just energy transforming and shifting)

But let me ask you this: Have you ever seen mother nature shift seasons abruptly?

It is never boiling hot and humid one day and freezing, dry and snowing the exact next day.

There are gradual shifts. Always!

Even a caterpillar turning into a butterfly does not do it in one single day or event.

It is in fact every day that it spends in its cocoon, pushing against it with its wings, the exact same process that is making them strong enough to be able to fly with.

But we only see the burst out of it.

We only see a radical change and assume that it must be the same for us.

But nature only has abrupt changes when out of balance. (as we are experiencing right now)

True (and long lasting) transformation is gradual.

Sometimes barely noticeable.

This applies to both positive and negative transformations.

It is NEVER a single event that shifts someone for the better (or for the worse).

It is always a series of events over time, with a tipping point that pushes the person over the edge.

However, to become addicted and endlessly pursue these experiences accompanied by fireworks is not only tiresome but unnecessary.

Nature does not intend for us to have to go through calamity and massive pain just so we can grow.

External pushes and abrupt change happens as a result of our inability to evolve by our own will and movement.

But the way of consciousness/ God/ The Universe is through balance.


Mindful, present awareness.

It is not through the extremes.

In fact, the best methods and teachers are those who remind you of (and place emphasis) on the essential practices to be explored ongoingly.

It is through these small, gradual shifts that you will inevitable reach a tipping point.

However, to chase the tipping point will have you attached to intensity and confuse it for growth.

To chase the strong releases will have you dismiss and disregard the importance of the daily practices.

In my work supporting and preparing people for their first ayahuasca retreat, I have noticed that everyone’s experience can be vastly different.

Those who are new to doing the personal work go into ceremony and usually get shown a subtle guidance towards their next step.

While those who have been putting in the work daily, slowly, patiently, usually get blasted out of this dimension and thrown deep into the oneness. (often experiencing death and coming back)

In years of working as a relationship coach I noticed the exact same pattern:
The guys who were expecting each workshop to be THE one experience to change them and improve their dating life, often kept waiting, and kept taking course after course, chasing different teachers, instructors and programs.

Those who acknowledged that change was a gradual process, and were focused on the 1% improvements, were the students that took what they learned and I rarely saw them again :)

Because they went off to live good, full, exciting lives.

They reached their tipping points very quickly by focusing on the gradual, small shifts.

So whether you are expecting for Jesus to come down from heaven and blast you with light and rescue you, or whether you believe that jumping and high-fiving for hours at a workshop will change your life, please remember that according to the story even the world took 7 days for God to create.

Even the buddha had to go through a personal process before reaching enlightenment.

And know that ANY promises of immediate transformation with disregard for the need towards daily practice and integration, are a smart way for some people to capitalize on your impatient needs and eagerness.

By all means keep transformation as the goal but choose presence and patience as your go-to tools.

For the seasons will inevitably arrive, slowly but surely, but only one day at a time!

PS: If you feel like some people you know would benefit from slowing down and giving up the chase for altered states, cathartic releases and quick fixes, PLEASE Share! :)

We change the world one perspective at a time, one person at a time

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