It has always surprised me how fast time seems to go by every year, and how the older we get the faster it goes. I remember as a kid, having to wait couple of weeks to go on vacations seemed like an eternity, waiting for the weekend to hang out with friends like a distant future. Right now it seems to pass at accelerating speeds. I read somewhere that the reason why this happens is because when we’re 5 years old waiting one year for something means waiting a time equivalent to 20% of our lifetime at that exact moment, whereas being 25, waiting one year for something accounts for only 4% of our lived time, and when we’re 50 only 2%. Therefore the older we get, the faster time passes in a literal sense, when looked from the relative perspective of our total years lived.
Every year I share what I learned, the areas where I grew, the experiences I had, and how grateful I was for it all. Yet reaching quarter of a century calls for something slightly different, so I decided to put together a list of the top 5 insights I had over all these years. I hope to shed some light on those on a similar path and for this to be a post for myself to look back into when I’m 50… and smile, maybe because I was a fool at this age, maybe because it will all make more sense then.
here goes the first one:
As a kid I thought life was a process of discovery yet I’ve found it is one of creation. We waste so much time thinking “I want to find my passion, I want to figure out what my path in life should be” as if it was something given to us externally. We wonder what is right for us, as if a divine beam of light would pierce through our ceiling and tell us what to do. The truth is that we play a proactive role in the life we choose to live. In every area we are responsible for what we experience. We’re not only the main actor of the story of our lives, but also the writer and director behind it.
The challenge is that from the moment we are born we’re bombarded with how life is supposed to be in every way. Media, parents, family, friends, school and society have a strong say in how we should live our lives. The type of ideal relationship, the idea of success, beauty, and so on. We’re gradually given the rules of the game of life, numbing our awareness to the fact that we don’t have to play this game if we don’t want to.
We get to create a completely new game, better suited and tailored to what we actually want. But it takes courage!
First we have to destroy every preconception we have about what our life is supposed to look like. To abandon the need to please others and to look good, to give up the search for external acceptance and approval. It is only then that our freedom to create and be who we want starts:
No more chasing after toxic Hollywoodesque romances, Instagram poser judgements of wealth and success and YouTube sixpack shortcuts.
The self inquiry process begins and we are able to define what success means to us. How we want our relationships to look like. How we go about our self image and so on. It doesn’t mean giving up the search for wealth, beauty and love.
Not at all.
It means to be authentic, to create a life motivated by passion instead of fear.
It means to fuel the search from our heart greatest desires and not from our worse mental insecurities.
So stop waiting and start creating!
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#2) Morality is wrong & Normal is an Illusion