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“I’m sorry love, I felt insecure..”

March 11, 2024


My wife said to me as soon as she entered my office after a difficult conversation we had just had over a shared work project.

Her face dropped as she reached for a hug

I paused what I was doing and held her for a few seconds, laying my head against her chest (since I was still sitting and she was standing.)

I suddenly got up and wrapped her with my arms and lifted her whole body as I started making my way towards the living room.

She started giggling out of confusion.

I held her in my arms until we came next to a mirror, I turned her around and as I held a tight hug from behind I asked her:

“What do you see?”

“What do you mean?” She said as her brain was trying to compute what was going on..

“Look into your eyes and tell me what you see.”

She started to fidget and tell jokes (signs of discomfort and releasing tension.)

“I see some pimples.. I see I might be growing a moustache.. I see the mirror needs cleaning..” she threw one after the other as she tried to make her way out of my bear grip.

I held tight.

“Please stop hiding or avoiding this moment.. What do you see?..

Who are you!?”

She could barely look into the mirror at her own reflection, so I stepped in.

“I will tell you what I see…

I will tell you who you are for me.

You are love incarnate.

You are sweetness, beauty and a heart of gold.

You are a strong woman with a sensitive soul.

You are grace, kindness and love in all you do.

Devotion, discipline and humility..

You are the woman I have chosen and I am proud of this choice..

You are my wife.”

I said one thing after the other without breaking eye contact with her reflection on the mirror.

Tears started dropping.

She sobbed.

I teared up a little too.

“Thank you, that was so touching..”

“You can thank me by never forgetting who you are.” (I thought to myself.)

We kissed and went on with our days.

I did forget to get her flowers on international woman’s day (because we don’t celebrate this day in Colombia) but hey.. if it’s about love and being loving I think I’m doing alright. 😅

On a normal day I would have just answered “It’s okay love” and turned back to my laptop and continue working after she came to apologize..

However, I recently came across a book titled “The Ultimate Coach”, which ironically has nothing to do with coaching and everything to do with BEING.

A book written about Steve Hardison where a few things touched me at the core, one of them the reminder that we get to CREATE who someone is for us.

And we get to choose -moment by moment- who we are.

I chose to be a fiercely loving and compassionate husband..

(More than to be someone who was busy and who needed to finish working on his laptop..)

I chose to re-create my wife in all her glory and power..

So she does not forget..

So I do not forget.

And in loving her

I felt loved.

I felt Love.