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Healthy Love, Unconditional Love

October 3, 2018


“National boyfriend day”? – Bitch please! 💁🏻‍♂️

More like “National who-I-settled-for-because-Im-afraid-of-being-alone-and-doing-my-inner-work Day”. Not hating, just calling it like it is. (And of course there are exceptions!) But I’ve found that most people join relationships for the wrong reasons. Most people see them as a place where they go to GET something.

To get love.

To get attention.

To get validation.

To get security.

To get meaning.

They go to get everything they have not learned to supply internally. And then they wonder how they ended up in a codependent, toxic partnership.

Most people’s only reason to be in a relationship is that they can’t stand the tension that comes from having an “Open” agreement. They want to make sure the other is not seeing or dating someone else, and what a better way than to sign this ‘contract’. So they enter out of neediness, fear or loneliness.

And a healthy relationship is one where we are not over giving or taking. We are SHARING. Two beautiful, whole, mature, baggage-free humans connecting from a space of appreciation and desire.

No need to own the other.

No need to control them.

Unconditional love starts from within and for the most part, the people I see in relationships today could have used a little more time to reflect and heal their traumas, wounds and deal with their inner bs. For one cannot pour from an empty cup, and two dried up broken ones will never (full)fill each other.

Nicolas Canon
Nico Canon is an artist, writer and dating coach. His art and writing are about reclaiming our right to be seduced by our lives and relationships. Through his work he explores the links between people and their deepest and rawest desires, opening up a bridge of self-expression and acceptance.

Value. Straight
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