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One of the greatest insights I had during the recent retreats was the importance of true friendship.

September 9, 2023


The word friend, or amigo (in spanish) comes from the latin ‘amicus’ which means a person who is loved.

And love -in its real and empowering sense- isn’t meekness, niceness nor people pleasing.

Love is the ultimate stand we can take for one another.

A place where we can see, beyond each other’s nonsense, the beauty, light and power that lies at the core of every human, and relate to them as such..

Never again looking down, having pity or agreeing with untruths.

No longer buying into their stories of limitation, separation and victimization.

Having compassion and understanding for what they go through without subscribing for a single second to them being smaller than their challenges or incapable of tapping into their heart’s strength.

During the last ceremony I was brought to my knees, quite literally, in agony and despair.

For the first time my body was no longer under my control, my mind was overwhelmed and I felt powerless to deal with any of it..

I felt weak, small and insignificant.

Decades of spiritual work and being grounded amounted to nothing in that moment..

Until a friend came and sat next to me, and feeling the vastness of his heart- I allowed myself to lean in and rely on him.

In that moment I understood that navigating life all by myself (and always being the one on whom people relied) was coming to an end.

In that moment I tapped into an exponential source of strength found in trusting high integrity friendship, and my ceremony turned around.

I saw that a friend is someone whose heart is there to keep you going, not to coddle you and agree with your smallness but to face the unknown side by side.

A friend stands for you being conscious and competent over merely comfortable.

That is love.

To act towards others from the highest place within us, relating to them as the highest place within them.

And friendship, a vehicle for men and women to exercise that love.

To be there for each other, never again as means of escapism and distraction but as allies towards mutual liberation.

Realizing that together, we are stronger.

Nicolas Canon
Nico Canon is an artist, writer and dating coach. His art and writing are about reclaiming our right to be seduced by our lives and relationships. Through his work he explores the links between people and their deepest and rawest desires, opening up a bridge of self-expression and acceptance.

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